Beam me up Scotty

They wouldn’t bend
They held on to the will of God so we are told
They wouldn’t bow
They would not bow their knees to Idols made of gold
They wouldn’t burn
They were protected by the Fourth Man in the fire
They wouldn’t bend
They wouldn’t bow, they wouldn’t burn.

-Johnny Cash “The Fourth Man in the Fire”

It's getting hot in here!


Be careful what you ask for, because you just might get it. Everyone who really knows me knows that I think I’m brown skinned and would love to be darker. Sounds crazy but its real. In a way that wish is coming true lol. After 22 brief sessions of radiation therapy, my boob is officially turning burnt sienna (ya’ll remember that crayon ha!).  

My daily trip to get beamed, as I have grown to call it, in a sense is effortless. I check in at 10:30 and am summons to the changing area over the intercom, put on a hospital gown, and walk out to the waiting area. Usually within a minute, my name is called, and I walk up to the technician at the computer, where my picture and info is on display. I state my birthday (ever single day even though it sounds trivial), then go lay down. Within 5 minutes, the zapping is complete and I am free until the next day. Same time, same place.

This is what the machine looks like...

The radiation machine looks so futuristic, and the room it’s housed in has a 24 inch thick steel door to seal it. All the techs leave the room and fire up the machine. It reminds me of being on Star Trek, when they would teleport to another place. I close my eyes and imagine the invisible beams are zapping any evil cancer cells that may lurk in the shadows.

Often times, I also think about Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. For those of you who have a confused face right now,  they are 3 men from the book of Daniel that were thrown into a fiery furnace for not bowing down to a golden idol of  King  Nebuchadnezzar . Anyone who refused would be sentenced to death in a furnace of fire. So brutal geesh! But the 3 men were not afraid and told him “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king.”  Infuriated, the King said, oh really?? Ok I got a trick for ya’ll bammas, and turned the fire up 7 times hotter than normal.  After being thrown into the fire, a soldier peers inside the furnace, and sees something very strange. “They answered the king, ‘True, O king.’ He answered and said, Lo, I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God. .'”[6] Nebuchadnezzar then ordered the three men to come out of the furnace, addressing them as ‘servants of the Most High God.’ [7] When they came out the next verses say that “the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair of their heads singed; their robes were not scorched, and there was no smell of fire on them”. (Wikipedia)

I like to think of myself as the modern-day S.M.A. (didn’t feel like typing their names again lol). I am going through the fire, 5 days a week, for 6 weeks, and in the end, I will come out and not even smell like smoke. *insert praise break* God is so good to us, and no matter what fire is trying to burn us up, not only will He rescue us, but He will protect us from damage and hurt while we are inside the “furnace”.

Yesterday,  I got a pleasant surprise: Wednesday will be the last day they zap the entire breast, and then they will target the place where the lump was removed, which is called the boost. The nurse said you have 8 more sessions Ms. Barnes. I was cheesing like the Cheshire cat!! I thought I was scheduled for 33 sessions, but I am now scheduled for 30. I went into the dressing room and started doing the running man, MC Hammer, and the typewriter! Siced is an understatement. The end is closer than I thought!!!

Party over here!!!!!!!!

On November 5th, 2010, I will be officially walking out the furnace for good, and I couldn’t be more elated. I never EVER want to go back into that room with the 24 inch steel door, but even if I did, I know the 4th man will be right beside me 🙂

Psalm 91:14-16 (MSG)

14-16 “If you’ll hold on to me for dear life,” says God,
      “I’ll get you out of any trouble.
   I’ll give you the best of care
      if you’ll only get to know and trust me.
   Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times;
      I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party.
   I’ll give you a long life,
      give you a long drink of salvation!”


9 thoughts on “Beam me up Scotty

  1. I just taught this bible lesson to my Kindergarten class. I just love your DC paraphrasing lol! Even more, I love that you are able to express yourself this way. Thanks for sharing your journey!
    Roar on Lion!

  2. Shelley,
    I truly admire your Courage, Strength, and Spirituality through you beating the fight against Breast Cancer. I know that it can be rough because I was there with my mother the whole time. I could not agree with you more you truly need a support system to get through this.But over all you are a strong woman and your story should be heard your book would be so therapeutic for people not only dealing with breast Cancer but any disease. Please share your story. Also, I am happy that I share my birthday with the last day of your radiation. You made it! You are a true Champion Shelley!! May God Continue to BLESS YOU!!

  3. YES! I pray God’s grace and blessings continue to pour into your life and you continue to share his truth through your writing.

    On a side note – you may be the brownest in the fam, but you’re still light skin! LOL!!

  4. Your a soldier and that’s an understatment. In spite of what we go thru victory awaits us, so continue overcoming, doing what people said was inpossible, and living life to the fullest. Love you dawg.

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